Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Remarkable Marks and Inevitable Detention


The famous history test for which R received no teaching and for which he could not revise because he was not at the school, has a coefficient 5 he informs me. Not being a mathematician I’m not quite sure what this means but think it means it counts for a lot and is a big proportion of your final validating Mark of Marks at the end of term. R is rather nervous. He organises a stern revision session with his father, conducted late at night (being the time Papa gets home).

He gets 14.5 out of 20! And the crowd cheered! This is a Remarkable Mark because 14.5 is the equivalent of 18 in any other European country (see Peter Gumbel). YES YES  HA HA  I'm King Mother, R is AvataR and we are still in the game, we are coming out on top, we have not been shot into detention.  Clever manipulation of economical  information beats teaching and learning French style, I do a Champ the Chimp victory dance. Actually the very best victory dance ever was done by Gollum in Lord of the Rings when he caught a couple of conies http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfRROGtD9QY

BUT OH NO WOE the very next day, R in very small voice “I got a detention Mum”

“Oh drat and double drat. What for?”

“Being in the wrong place at the wrong time".

“What do you mean by that?”

“I was playing with my friends and we weren’t supposed to be there”

Snapping into detective mode I asked “did you know you were in the wrong place?”

“Actually, Mum I didn’t. (Actually?, I’m suspicious)

“I suppose they don’t know you are new…” I mumbled stupidly

“They don’t listen at all Mum” Oh yes, I forgot.

Did your friends know they were in the wrong place?”

“Yes”.

I'm thinking:  Who are these guys? Are they Nice Boys?

“if you hang around with people who break the rules you will have a lot of detentions and I can’t do anything to help you, you will get a Reputation and ruin your school career and I will be called in by Mrs Scruton at 4pm on a Thursday and your father will not be able to go and it won’t matter how many homeopathic tranquillisers I’ve taken I will definitely ***6&$$$/22+++****/!!!! ....tell her what I think.   Think about who you choose as your friends. Is there someone in the class who does not break the rules with whom you could be friends?”

“But they are nice” (as Ronnie said of Reggie).

“Anyway Mum don't worry it’s me who is being punished not you…"

“I AM punished when you are because I feel bad for you, and annoyed.”

Oh boy.

Detention 3 weeks into his time, is the game over, or is this just a meaningless setback? 3 weeks, quite a long time, not bad eh?

AvataR prepares for the next challenge…at any time soon the King Mummy AvataR team will be required to bring in a Fish Head for dissection of dead flesh in the name of studying “Life”. This school does not know what life is.

Postscript
Later R tells me that his detention has been commuted to a NOTE of WRONGDOING (known in french as un mot) in his prison records.  I will have to read what he has done and where, and sign it with my initials and then someone else will write SEEN over it, with the date and the school stamp.  I can live with that.
And he got 17 out of 20 for maths, that should gives him some credits for the inevitable behavioural cock ups...yep, I reckon we're still in the game.

STILL NO DETENTION!

I am still a little worried about developing obsessive compulsive disorder and R turning into a gangster though.