Oh No Diet

Yesterday I bought a diet book from our Amazon account.  Within 3 HOURS my husband had noticed the purchase (remarkable, how does he get time what with his stressful job?) and immediately assumed that an intruder had gained access to our account.

For a moment I considered pretending it wasn't me, but let's face it, I'm a truth compulsive.  JC responded with a look in his eyes which seemed to say "is our money going down the drain again?".

"Don't worry" I said "If it's no good at least I can eat the book - I'll cut it up of course, and only permit myself to eat one page a day..."

There's no escaping it,  I keep getting fatter - getting as in present continual.  I have already accepted that I have got a little plump as I made my way up from a size 10 to a size 16, but it doesn't stop there.  Where does it stop?

I've been thinking about tricking myself into some kind of fat reduction programme for at least 5 years,  but have finally taken the decision for the following 2 reasons:

1. friend P did a dubious French diet where she eats nothing but protein and veg and claims she has never felt better and can fit into old skirts, and frankly readers, I considered her a bit scrawny to begin with... 
2. ...and then another friend H told me she was going to celebrate 15 years of marriage and her husband's 50th birthday by wearing her wedding dress.  JC and I have just celebrated 15 years of marriage, I was 5 months pregnant at the time, but bouncer in split seam floor length silk crepe is not a look I'm going for...

So, I've gone for Patrick Holford Low GL Bible which promises more energy less fluid retention and more health and vitality and doesn't talk at all about FOOD DEPRIVATION.  I'm already planning not to stick to it.  I can't bear following instructions and have an improvisation compulsion and I absolutely can't bear not eating what I want when I want.  Apart from this I am the ideal candidate for a diet.

Postcript
The book has arrived.  It is rather large.  I am carrying around in my rucksack.  I am hoping this can be considered as pre-diet weight training as I have not yet plucked up the courage to start the diet.